Try not to bring the case to a situation like: "Like snow on the head"! Believe me, it will be too cruel, even if your wife is also to blame for the cooling of feelings. For any normal woman to suddenly find out that she has a rival, a severe shock. And if in addition the husband is going to her to leave. The case could result in, at best, extreme stress in the worst – resistant disorder of health. You don't want then to be tormented by remorse?
Take advance steps to ensure that the wife began to suspect. If she's already puzzled by the idea that, if you were cheating on her, psychologically, the subsequent explanation will be easier. Linger more often than usual, as if by forgetfulness, use of perfume lovers. Any woman would instantly smell of unfamiliar perfume!
Her questions and reproaches, answer with feigned indignation: why, Yes as a thought you could all come to a head, you know that you're the only one I have! Try that excuse sounded very lame.
Begin to show discontent, fault-finding, saying, prepare you, darling, unimportant, and in the house an eternal mess. It will strengthen the wife to the idea that you have an object for comparison, and he – alas! – not in her favor.
And finally, admit it. At the same time try to take all the blame for the breakup on yourself, stand it in the sense that you are simply unworthy of such a wonderful woman like your wife. She will still be bad, but the shock will not be as strong as it could be.
Before leaving my wife for the mistress, think not three, but thirty-three times! Since there is no guarantee that you will not make a fatal, unforgivable mistake. It is in this case, try to leave my wife maximally peaceful. Who knows, if you have to return, asking for forgiveness?
Advice 2 : What if the husband has a mistress
To stay for my husband's one and only true love in life, few succeed. The reasons for infidelity can be different: passion, boredom, trying to find something that could not give a wife a desire for new sensations, etc. options out of an unpleasant situation too many, and look for the most suitable victims of infidelity have their own.
Keep calm and don't panic. After learning about the betrayal of the husband, women often feel pain, anger, hatred, a burning desire to take revenge, and then the devastation and bitterness. Leave for a couple of days to a friend or to your parents, weep, talk to someone about your grief, but don't make any important decisions rashly. Do not make the scandals and especially not expel her husband from the house. Wait until you can talk calmly.
Decide whether you want to stay with her husband or not. Remember: to live with a man after infidelity, you need to be able to truly forgive, otherwise resentment and doubts in fidelity of the beloved will torment you for a very long time. If you decide to leave, do so, not paying attention to the threats, blandishments and promises to leave his mistress. If want to keep the family together – fight to the end.
Try to understand what pushed your husband to the search of love of his mistress. If you can't look at the situation from the outside, ask for help to a psychologist. After ascertaining the cause, eliminate it. For example, if you know that her husband just got a little carried away and decided to have a short affair, provide a stable and quiet family life. Hardly the man to decide to change it to a woman who is interesting to him only in bed.
Do not revenge, and certainly not make lover to spite her husband. When you change only one partner, the situation can still be saved, but when mired in lies both, only one way out – divorce. If you want to annoy the mistress and destroy her relationship with your husband, act not brute force, and cunning. For example, start sending her flowers with passionate anonymous letters and make sure they are delivered in those moments when your husband and his mistress together. The man surely would suspect that a mistress is cheating on him, and it will help you to ruin their relationship.
Do not dwell on their grief. Change the interior, visit the beauty salon, get a haircut, hang out with old friends, pamper yourself with a trip to the cinema or expensive purchases, radically change its image. Strive to change and pleasant feelings, and then to cope with cheating husband will become much easier.
Advice 3 : How to understand and outwit the mistress
There is little that can shake and hurt a woman more than the cheating husband. Especially if that she – cheated wife, she tells the mistress of her husband. For example, on the phone. Yes, even in the most insulting, sarcastic expressions: they say, marriage has become a mere formality, the husband lives with her only for the sake of the children or obedience to a sense of duty.
Shock, shock, burning resentment. The woman seems at such a moment, as if the ground was slipping from under his feet. The first and most natural reaction: that can't be, it's kind of a joke or revenge! But the interviewee begins to tell his wife about such details that were known only to her husband, and just savoring them. And before the shocked woman gradually comes: this is not a joke not revenge, but sad truth. What to do? To make a big stink about the wrong husband? To file for divorce? Stop! Now think, because it achieves this mistress. What she called you. Really from the notorious women's solidarity, saying that she, poor thing, didn't even know about the true image of his hubby so I told her to reveal eyes? Nothing of the sort. Her only goal is to make you hurt, so you decided to break off relations with her husband.
Try to understand your opponent as a woman. She also want family happiness. Bothers her the status of mistress, she wants to be called lawful wife. She can't bear the thought that your husband stubbornly refused to leave his family that it was temporary. It is clear that this woman feels for you is jealousy and an instinctive dislike, because you interfere with her happiness. Her testimony is an attempt to displease, to enrage you, to destroy your marriage. Did you go on about her actually fulfilling her deepest desire?
Of course, you're really offended, angry. But still try to calm down, because important decisions need a cool head. Objectively and impartially analyze your family relationships, try to find an answer to the question: why do the husband has a mistress, what he lacked? If you have enough wisdom and justice to acknowledge that what happened there is your share of the blame, consider that half the work is already done. Make the necessary adjustments in their behavior, and a husband very soon will draw to you like a magnet.
In any case, do not take revenge on the mistress, don't come to her work or home with the showdown. They themselves would be guilty. Remember: she wants to provoke you to play the role of innocent Martyr. Don't give her the satisfaction.
If you decide to save your marriage, try not to blame the her husband, moreover, is not blackmail: "Go to her – do not give to meet with the kids." It is unworthy, and just plain stupid. It is better to calmly let him know that you know everything, but are willing to forgive and forget. This simple technique you outsmart the mistress would upset her machinations.
Advice 4 : How to behave, if the husband has other
When people marry, they hope, will preserve their happiness and love for all life. But sometimes the couple interferes with somebody else, and then the family begin a serious problem.
Before taking any action, verify that the husband indeed has a mistress. Let's watch his behavior. If it's on a phone call, leaves the room, would often spend weekends supposedly "friends", has been delayed after work, not interested in the problems of the family - rather, he was interested in another woman. But to clarify everything accurately can only be a Frank conversation. 're gonna cheat and say that you called a strange girl and admitted in connection with her husband. Let's see how he will behave. If easy, I would say that this is someone's joke, he loves only you, then most likely rival you imagined. And if you start to make excuses to make trouble, shouting that he was framed, etc., so the reason for the experience really is.
After the conversation, do not take hasty decisions. If you want to keep the family together - we must act subtly. Pretend to believe my husband about the lack of a rival. But do think about why the faithful went "left." Most likely, you changed a lot after the wedding - relaxed, got fat, stopped to care for themselves. You don't have surprises and not interested in what my husband at the shower. It is this inattention to yourself and the lack of interest in the partner and pushed wife on the adventure. To return it to the family, you will have to change completely. Be a perfect woman - beautiful, slender, sexy, well-groomed, popular, caring and passionate. After seeing your transformation, the husband must return to his family.
It is not necessary to call a rival and scandal. To anything good it will not. She will tell her husband about it. He gets mad, more at myself for not being able to cover their campaigns. And that anger will push him to serious decisions. Or he can stay in the family, deciding that the best wife no one. Or will go to another, realizing that to stay with his wife no longer can. If you are not confident in their abilities, do not let the opponent to understand that I know about it. When you converted, conversation with her is not required, the husband himself will break this relationship.
Advice 5 : What if the husband found out about the lover
Sooner or later the treachery of one of the spouses may open, however, even such a seemingly hopeless situation can have a calm and peaceful resolution.
If a man finds out about the betrayal of his wife, the beloved should have a serious talk. That's just before the conversation the wife has for itself to decide whether she wants to continue to preserve the family and to beg her husband for forgiveness or, perhaps, to collect things and to leave this person in the past. If the second options are of course, in the case of the first, the fairer sex have to do serious work on the bugs. However, in any case, most likely, a big scandal can not be avoided.
How to keep the family together after the infidelity of the wife
Remember that in a situation of adultery of the wife cannot be to blame only the woman. Try to understand the reason for the betrayal. Most often these include the inattention of her husband, banal boredom, suspicion of male infidelity, or a new love. Once you become clear on why you decided to take this step, be well prepared to the conversation with the beloved, as the spouse will begin to question about who he is his opponent, how long have you had contact with him, what feelings you feel about him.
Select the right time for this difficult conversation and try to tell me what exactly was the reason for your infidelity. Be patient and be prepared for the fact that her husband just will not listen to you. In this case, you will have to wait until then, until it has cooled and he did not raise this issue. Apologize to your loved ones, promise never to commit such mistakes. Most likely, if the spouse decides to give you a second chance, you for a long time will have to return his trust.
Try to return to this subject, more interested in what excites your husband (men love it when they listen, be attentive, patient, gentle, spending more time together with your loved ones, more likely to remember the pleasant moments spent together years, pay special attention to your intimate life and create a romantic mood.
If the spouse decides not to forgive you and ask for a divorce, do not arrange hysterics and scandals, remember, partly you yourself have destroyed your love. Release this man, give him a chance to become happy in other ways. Besides, you will soon find the person that will never betray. Eventually everything will fall into place, so do not despair, to suffer and fall into depression.