The legal consequences of gossip
Spreading rumors and gossip is a phenomenon that occurs in my life often enough. People who do this can and should be punished. According to the legislation of the Russian Federation, in the Criminal code there is article 129, which provides for legal punishment for people slandering anyone. If you have evidence that this or that citizen really has spread about you about damaging information, you can file a claim in court.
However, as a rule, to prove such an act can be difficult.
How to get revenge on the man for gossip, lies and rumours
If the person is famous for the love to the dissolution of gossip and rumors, not only can you go to court, but also to come up with a fair punishment.
Just remember that the punishment of the offender should not go beyond the law.
Use against the offender's own gun. Tell your friend that trusted this man, and he not only betrayed you and told someone your secrets, but remember to embellish and to turn. Surely after such information people will begin to avoid contact with the gossip, the fear of being in such an unpleasant situation.
Another way of punishment for gossip - committing petty mischief. If you know where a person lives, his exact address and call any flowers or food and make a reservation in his name. Let this order will be released at a fairly decent sum of money. Of course, your abuser is not going to pay, but spoiled the mood is guaranteed.
In addition, if gossip spreads your girl friend, and she has a husband, you can use a flower delivery. Send her a gift and ask the courier to do the caption: "Thank you for a wonderful night. With love, Igor." Jealousy and scandal in the family, most likely, not be avoided.
If your abuser was a married man, podhodite the time when he will be with his wife or sweetheart, and start writing him messages of an intimate nature. This method has unconditional effects.
The most important thing that you should do - after some time hint the gossip that all the trouble happening in his life is a result of his love for spreading false and defamatory information about other people.
Advice 2 : How not to pay attention to gossip
The nature of gossip
To understand how not to pay attention to gossip, well to first clarify to yourself, why do people gossip? In fact, gossip is an integral part of human communication, and here's why.
Man lives in society, and more specifically, is a member of several more or less large communities or social groups. This school class, and student group and work team, a group of friends and even family. People is such that he likes to communicate with those who are most similar to: adhere to the same beliefs, ethical installations, belongs to the same social class with him and even has a certain resemblance (racial and ethnic characteristics, manner of dress, etc.).
Of course, people are the same no and be can not. But in each community is the majority of individuals who have the greatest number of such similarities. If there is someone who is too different from the others, its starting to discuss and condemn.
So maybe the only way to avoid gossip is to be "all", i.e. to demonstrate the features and qualities inherent in the majority of the members of a particular social group? Yes, in this case to be subjected to condemnation and discussion is much less likely. But the way this is not too good.
First, each person will always find something that is not accepted and is assessed negatively by a majority of the members of a social group, thus no one can be completely protected from gossip.
And secondly, social groups are different, and in each of them the "norm", and thus, passing from group to group, have to constantly adjust to the requirements of each of them. That's where the direct road to the constant stress and depression!
But if the gossip is impossible to stop, you need to learn not to react too sharply. How to do it?
How to be a gossip
To get rid of the guilt and accept myself. It is not easy, it's much nicer to listen to praise than condemnation. But for all it is impossible to become "right" and "good". Yes, each person is different, and sometimes his "shortcomings" are the flip side of its advantages. You need to take those parties that do not like others to realize that they are the personality characteristics and in response to the criticism calmly say: "Yes, I am."
Understand that any gossip ever end. People are interested in others as long as they do not appear more important and pressing issues of concern to them. As soon as this happens, the gossip subside by themselves.
Is gradually forming its own circle. Try that in any social group there is enough people who share your views and beliefs, leading a similar lifestyle and have similar tastes. In the circle of friends, the likelihood of gossip is much less.
Advice 3 : How to close mouth gossiper
To give a solid response
The best solution to the problem is to put gossip into place, firmly marking out its position. If you became the witness of how someone began to discuss someone's life without the presence of discussed, you can soft or rough form to make it clear that gossip is a manifestation of human weakness. Most often, the gossips are the fact that in an open confrontation with them, no one enters, and it can be used. They object to nothing, because gossiping is really unworthy of self-respecting man.
You can use neutral phrases: "I don't want to talk about it", "I'm not interested", etc. you Can go stiffer if gossips don't understand the first time: "what do you have most of Masha/Petit/Claudia Ivanovna did not ask?", "Only behind my back to scratch much", etc.
If this happens in the workplace is likely this will have to face very often, so his position should be immediately and very clearly. Otherwise be drawn into a discussion of someone else's life will you.
To ignore what is happening
Another option how to deal with the problem of gossip, it is considered neglect. You can not pay attention to rumors, ostentatiously get up and leave when someone gets an unpleasant conversation, to include headphones and doesn't notice themselves or gossip, nor their violent activities. Someone knows how to do this tactfully without hurting the feelings of others, others think that, on the contrary, it is necessary to strongly emphasize the unacceptable behavior of gossip.
If the situation occurs at work, the best way of ignoring will work. No need to go and drink coffee with those who be sure to start a conversation about someone else or to inquire something from you. Better to do something to catch it in time and show that the work, first of all, you need to work. The one who really works, absolutely no time to chat with the gossip and focus on someone else's life.
To change the subject
A popular technique which can resist the spread of gossip, is considered a change of subject. So, hardly someone will begin its popular "A present...?", you can say: "Yes, it's still that, but about johnny Depp in the paper it says...". This, of course, will not stop the conversation, but it's better to let fans of the "wash up bones" discuss hardly familiar with them johnny Depp, what new Secretary of the boss or a sick employee.
In the office you can easily switch attention splenocolic at work. To translate the theme here is pretty easy too: "by the Way, guys, and report accurately last checked?" or "What happened to the holidays decided?". The options can be many, but, of course, gossip can not understand that so have you tried to quit their unpleasant conversation.
Advice 4 : Learning how to respond to gossip
Usually, gossip is a distorted version of reality, or speculation, and the idea of history, unsubstantiated by the facts.
It is considered that the founders of gossip are exclusively women. Men have nemnogosloven and lack of interest in conveying information about what is happening in the lives of their friends. However, the male population susceptible to the spread of gossip in equal measure with the female half.
Reaction to gossip
First and foremost, not respond to gossip aggression and excuses. These actions will create the effect the veracity of the information in the eyes of others. One who is not guilty will not look for excuses, to speak in his own defence or to attack the opponent. A strong response to the rumor, the reaction will only reinforce the interest of others.
The best option reaction to the rumor is its absolute disregard. Not received in response to share emotions, gossip will soon lose interest in the fictional story and to the person that was targeted. Be aware that often people that spread gossip have absolutely no outstanding events in life, there is nothing of interest to them, therefore they find fun, coming up with false stories about other people. In addition, this category of the population may differ with envy more successful and diversified people that can also cause gossip.
In the case when gossip clearly denigrates the honor and dignity of the person, accusing him in any action, substituting in the eyes of people whose opinion is authoritative, it is possible to open dialogue with the distributor of gossip, which should clarify the basis for his story, is there to substantiate its facts. Should enlist the support of witnesses and people who heard the story from the person. However, such a development can lead to conflict and tension in the team.
Gossip is a positive side – if you want to create a reputation, to attract attention to any event, it is enough to tell the "big secret" information to gossip, and soon the story will get the necessary distribution.
Thus, the most advantageous option when responding to gossip is ignoring them or using in their own interests.