Advice 2: How to develop interpersonal skills
But most people have certain problems, and therefore strive to develop good communication skills, knowing that it depends largely on the quality of their lives. The reasons for this are different:
- Defects of speech binds many people that makes others think about their uncommunicative.
- Low social status, and self-doubt (the reasons for such is the theme of an entirely different conversation), leads to difficulties in communicating with people with a high position in society. An example might be hiring when you need to contact the company Manager or personnel Department, and such people are usually confident that confuses uncommunicative, insecure candidates.
- A variety of complexes, the origin of which is missing the parents, and as adults we sometimes just don't know how to deal with them. For example, the problems are those whom today's youth calls "nerds" — really smart people, but absolutely not adapted to life in society, as in the first place have, as a rule, is science and other interests, not communication. But this is just one example — there are many, and getting rid of them is often only possible with the help of a psychologist.
How to develop interpersonal skills
To develop communication skills, it is necessary to find the cause of problems with communication. The best way is to contact your psychologist, possibly, pass the special trainings, which together with people who have similar problems, you will be able to overcome those.
But the appeal to the psychologist many seem inaccessible either for financial reasons or because of distrust and fear to recognize the existing problems. Therefore, people often resort to other methods of acquiring skills of communication:
- Reading specialized books helps some people to understand why they are afraid of communication, and how to fix it.
- A bit of effort to start to communicate, sometimes give impetus to the development of new abilities and communication skills in General. In this way, you can try to communicate with people who do not mind to accept you in their company. But too often, the impetus for the development of communication skills sufficient to speak with a random companion or in a store with someone, for example, to determine or to help with the selection of goods.
- Avoid communication through the Internet today, this has resulted in the loss of skills of live communication on the part of many young people. The Internet allows you to hide the flaws behind the words and the edited photo (the truth of which may also be questionable), it is enough to turn off the computer to just stop talking. It's easy to ignore people you don't like or who don't like you and they are talking about it directly. The specificity of the Internet environment is liked by many, but robbed them of the last of the skills of live communication. Despite the fact that even the business is degenerating more and more companies are virtual, while offering real goods and services for real money without skills in other areas of life still can not do.
- The development of their personal abilities, to achieve a new success — it is an occasion to strengthen your self-confidence, increase self-esteem. But these factors often determine the ability to communicate. Try to talk even with a stranger, and you will realize that your fears are not justified.
Of course, ways to overcome the barrier, there are many. And the choice depends on your character, reasons for closure or the occurrence of specific difficulties in communication.