Advice 2: How to recognize an unreliable person?
What is a reliable person
A reliable person, friend or partner - someone who will not disappoint your trust, will not throw in a difficult moment, share with you the joy and sorrow. He will fulfill the promises given to you, will not promise what can not do, will not throw words to the wind, will not fail and will not be substituted, and in adverse circumstances will help to get out of an unpleasant situation, sharing the responsibility with you. In other words, such a person will not disappoint your hopes. A reliable person is a great benefit, whether it is related to personal life or business issues. An unreliable partner, on the contrary - the source of many problems and disappointments. How to distinguish reliable from unreliable person?
The rule of first impressions
First impression - the most correct, psychologists say. However, unreliable people try to do everything to produce the most favorable impression exactly when they first met. Is there a view that people know everything about each other, not only can quickly transfer this information from the realm of the subconscious into the conscious plane of thought. You should trust your gut.
If you feel the slightest discomfort, try to understand why it happened, what the behavior of the interlocutor, you seemed awkward. Perhaps he is too kind, flattering? Maybe, his behavior is clearly sexual challenge? If we are talking about a romantic Dating - it is completely natural. But if we are talking about a joint business, transaction, business or project - it suggests that you are trying to "get on the hook" to use, and in the mind of your counterpart does not what he says aloud.
Than give themselves untrustworthy
Despite the fact that unreliable, but interested in you the person struggling to make a favorable impression, there is a whole system of subtle signals, which gives him away because he is not internally confident. Look closely, watch him, and you will discover a lot of interesting details that can not be concealed. The unreliability, that is, visible to the naked eye, the "crack" of the unfaithful is not so difficult, the main thing is to honestly admit what you see.
- Pay attention to the eyes, catch his eye. Unreliable people try to look away, to look around or dropped his eyes down.
- Another feature of the opinion unreliable: during a conversation about the important things it can withstand your opinion, but look like through you, into the void. This speaks of a stronger character, but instead openness for this habit of looking "through" the interlocutor lies the audacity and even cynicism.
- Note how the dialogue. You have the impression that the interlocutor can't hear or see, stating your point of view? He tries to impress, as if admiring themselves and extremely concerned about the impression? It speaks of insecurities, you selfish egomaniac, and it is unlikely that your problems will ever cause him the desire to solve them together.
- Listen carefully during the conversation, and as the man says. Perhaps you feel that you're hiding something under that topic of conversation? Your specific questions remained unanswered, but the caller turned the conversation to another topic? Looks like this person wants something from you to hide, and therefore, there are serious reasons to doubt its reliability.
- Be careful with what intonation speaks to you the interlocutor. Subtle humiliation, awkward words that make you embarrassed, gentle barbs, the unkind irony - all this suggests that man has a "double bottom", and you have reason to doubt that his attitude towards you are kind and sincere.
- Watch his emotions. Maybe exaggerated optimism and too bright prospects trying to trap you, to involve in relationships, which then become the source of problems? Your partner too much promises? Interrupts you? Do not rush to take him at his word. Everything that looks "too", should alert you, since it tells about probable try to "catch" you on the weaknesses and manipulate you. People talk about it, "lays Gently but firmly to bed"
- Reverse option: the person defends himself in advance from possible expectations and illusions about him. He refers to some hidden circumstances over which he had no control, says that it is of little independent, alluding to the fact that it should not expect more than he can do. Most likely, you, or anyone, with a bunch of nasty secrets, and even the smallest promise he does not fulfill.
That suggests that before you is a reliable person
- Reliable man will not hide his eyes, he will answer you sure open eyes, full of genuine interest.
- In conversation he will be interested in and your circumstances, and talking about some kind of joint thing he will be similar to the person who solves the problem of addition. This is not surprising, as a joint affair for him - a reality, and it will estimate what you can do other to be useful.
- Describing the project or drawing prospects for a common future, a reliable person expressed very simply, looks practical. The situation in the description is clear, clear and specific. Reliable people - realistic, they do not need to try to make a personal impression on you as the main thing for them is not it. Such people will not include charm, to seduce, to flirt in order to gain your attention to the person, as the main thing is for them joint business, referred to.
- Reliable person will not miss a single question, will not miss a single nuance, because for him it is important that you clearly represented a situation that may be for you overall.
- In talking about the joint or about the romantic prospects of a reliable person will not allow malice, will not attempt to hurt or subtly humiliate you. On the contrary, he is extremely polite, friendly, sincere. Sincerity is something that you can feel instinctive confidence in him.
- Reliable person will not interrupt you, but rather listen to what you want to say, as in the relationship reliable people see first - mate, interested in positive results not only for themselves but also for you. In other words, a reliable partner will take care of that common cause and common future suit both of you.
Reliability needs to be mutual
Reliable is a quality of character. They say that people with common traits and attitude towards life attracted to each other. Take a look at yourself. Do you make promises? Are you able not to withdraw from the partner in difficult times and to share the responsibility? Honestly admit mistakes or looking for an opportunity to dump the responsibility on the other? Are you ready to take responsibility for their words and deeds, to fulfill its obligations?
These are all very important. Because reliability in relations should be mutual. After all, a reliable person, faced with the irresponsibility, unpredictability, cunning and unreliable, most likely, will not throw begun, but by the end - just don't want to have more business with an unreliable partner. So they are reliable people.