Communication problems between teenagers - why do they occur
Before you can understand how to help the child to solve the problem of communication with peers, you need to determine the cause of the differences. Only after you observe it, will find the right solution. But to find the origins of the conflict is sometimes very difficult. Because the aggression of adolescents are often determined by subjective rather than objective factors. For example, kind and helpful children become outcasts just because they do not want or can not give offenders resistance. And adults must help Teens adapt to society. Otherwise it will lead to serious psychological problems from which it will be difficult to get rid of even as an adult.
How to help Teens to build relationships with peers
If a teenager says that he had problems in communication with peers is a good thing. It means that he trusts an adult, realizes that he can help. It is much worse when the child withdraws into himself, and the parents don't even know that he had some complicated situation. First and foremost, it's hard for the teenager. He has no support either in peer group or in family. And this situation should be corrected immediately.
To a teenager was Frank, not worth it to push. I must say that you love him the way he is. What he wanted, and in any situation can count on the support. Even if he is wrong, you will be on his side and try to help solve any conflict issues with peers. This does not mean that you will have to call a friend of the child, and to persuade them to be friends with him. The main objective of talk to convince the teenager the confidence and the knowledge that parents are always on his side. With such baggage, it will become much more bold in communicating with peers, learn to respond to offenders, will not be shy about new relationships that may give rise to true friendship.
To a teenager it was easier to build relationships with classmates or friends from the yard, offer to organize a party at home. The reason can be any - successful completion of quarter, new year, birthday, etc. Give children the freedom. Preparing a meal for a holiday, away from home. Without adults adolescents become more open. And your child, being on its territory, without parental supervision, will be able to show all their best qualities. Feeling himself the master, he will become confident, and others will feel it. The attitude familiar to him will change and it will only be a positive change. Such gatherings can be repeated several times to secure the result. Maybe after they will have a Grand harvest. But the small energy cost in order to help the child to adapt to the complex and sometimes aggressive teenage society.
The main task of parents is to help the child become more open and confident. Then there will be less conflict situations with peers. This task will help to cope the passion or hobby of a teenager. If he loves sports, write it in the section if the beautiful painting in art school, if good singing and dancing, give to the theater group. There teen will meet people with similar Hobbies and will definitely find a common language with them. He will learn to communicate with diverse friends, and solve problems with peers it will be much easier.
Parents whose children had problems in communicating with peers, noted that they often appeared in the transition to a new school and moving to another area. At this moment you need to be most attentive to the teenager. He may not admit that it would be hard to hide your resentment. It is therefore very important to observe his psychological state, to notice the mood swings in a difficult moment to help.
Advice 2 : Conflicts of the teenager with their peers. How to behave parents
Don't blame the teenager
For a teenager it is very important to be accepted among peers, full and trusting communication. In what colors would be perceived by the teenager in later life depends largely on, learn to trust it, to friends, to love and to communicate in school. It is therefore not surprising that in adolescence, when actually all experienced very serious, hard teenager responds to their conflicts and lack of understanding with their peers.
Find out why
The first thing to talk to yourself a teenager. Ask him what happened as he sees the reasons for the situation. If the teenager withdraws into himself and does not want to communicate, it is necessary to know the details of the situation, the class teacher of teachers. However, as you know, teachers also are not always fair and objective in relation to the child.
Adults do not always need to intervene in the conflict between teenagers
The task of parents - to understand how serious the problem is. If we are talking just about the fight the best of friends, although such conflicts in adolescents occur rapidly, but direct intervention with adults, trying to reconcile the participants – the worst thing you can offer. Best friends can put up and fussing multiple times a day, in boys, often it comes to blows. Provide the young to negotiate and solve their problems – they have this wonderful work!
The most useful thing you can do is to tell the teenager about the more "civilized" ways of resolving the conflict, to show the practical benefits of compromise. Do not the form of homilies about good behaviour, but in the form of friendly advice, examples from his own experience.
It's quite a different situation, it requires the attention and intervention of adults.
The teenage environment is quite aggressive, and perhaps in each group, each class has its own "rogue" or "white crow". This does not mean that in reality this child is "the worst". Not like all – this is not a negative feature, after all, on the contrary, the child may be different from other "plus sign"
Problems in communication with peers, lack of acceptance by group, class, perceived themselves as a teenager is very difficult – can cause depression and even suicide.
If you, as a parent, faced with such a problem your child, then do not let it go, don't blame the teenager. This is a very serious problem which the teenager can not cope. Intervention teachers in "classroom conflicts" can only aggravate the situation – peers will perceive the teenager as a "complainer", which will lead to more rejection and humiliation. Be prepared that you likely will have to transfer the child to another school. However, in order to new problems are not repeated, and the child coped with the consequences of serious psychological trauma "outcast" is necessary to consult with work with a good psychologist. And, of course, your support as the people close to child!