Learn to understand the melancholic, although this is very difficult. They are often closed in their own world, and you have to put a lot of effort to achieve their trust.
Keep some distance between you. Melancholic not like it when someone invades their personal space, so stay away from them at arm's length. Try not to touch their stuff because to them they are also very jealous.
Carefully watch your language and tone. Avoid ambiguous phrases, because the melancholic may not correctly understand you and be offended. They are very closely watching your behavior and draw conclusions. Even if you throw a quick glance at the clock during the conversation, the melancholic may decide that you're bored with the conversation.
Do not speak too quickly, clearly and to the point. They don't like long-winded speeches about nothing: do not ramble. Too long conversations wearing them, they feel tired and want to be alone. Do not impose their society, if they feel that person wants to be alone. Never criticize or speak up about it too sharply.
Observe his gestures and movements: they help to understand what not to say melancholic. A sign of excitement, irritation or hostility can serve his nervous movements, for example, he will hold in his hands the handle or thoroughly clean the countertop. If he straightens his hair or smooth hair, it means something alarming.
Be patient and do not rush things, let the melancholic to open with appropriate speed. Try to be kind to him, be understanding, sympathize, and try to lighten the mood. When it unfold in front of you and begin to trust, you will appreciate its great inner peace and get a good, loyal friend.
Advice 2: Who better to work the melancholic
Type of temperament is an innate property of the psyche, which is largely due to the physiology. Therefore, to consider temperament when choosing a type of activity is necessary. Especially "unlucky" in this regard, the melancholic, because of the 4 types of nervous activity only is he weak.
The peculiarities of the melancholic temperament
Currently, the most widespread classification of types of temperament Pavlov. According to his theory, each of the 4 types of temperament correspond to certain peculiarities of nervous reactions in the body. Describing them, Pavlov used the following characteristics of the nervous processes, as
- speed and strength of reactions.
According to this classification, 4 type of nervous system that corresponds to the melancholic temperament, characterized by such features as a weakness and imbalance of the flow of nervous processes, slow and weak response to stimuli.
This means that the melancholic barely resists the impact of strong incentives, has little activity and endurance, at the same time anxious, prone to anxiety, are poorly adapted to the new environment and new people, prefers solitude. At the same time, he is prone to intense emotions, which leaves "in itself", without emotions outward.
Eysenck, describing a melancholic, talked about the fact that it is an introvert with high sensitivity. A man extremely sensitive to criticism, easily tired, not able long to endure the physical and mental stress, sullen, and inclined to pay more attention to his inner world than other people and external factors.
As a rule, representatives of this temperament are prone to low self-esteem, excessive sensitiveness, avoid challenges and prefer to be alone.
Working conditions for melancholic
However, the melancholic may be an effective employee, it is important to provide them with favorable working conditions.
1. Melancholic bad mixer, it would be hard to work in a team, therefore, it is preferable to give individual assignments.
2. Tight schedule, the melancholic is not suitable in such a framework it quickly loses strength and therefore performance. So, it is better to choose a job in which a representative of the temperament could independently determine the schedule, and regulate your mode of work and rest.
3. Melancholic emotional, as a rule, has a rich inner world and under certain conditions can be quite successfully cope with the creative work.
4. Evaluation of the work of the melancholic should be in a soft friendly manner – he is extremely sensitive to harsh criticism.
5. In its activities, the melancholic is better to avoid emergency situations that require an immediate response.
6. Work with customers, people of this type are extremely hard, this can wear them out emotionally, so it is better not to choose the activity in which face daily with a large number of people (the service sector, pedagogy, etc.).
The most preferred representatives of this type is "office" work, during which they will be able to allocate time to perform a certain volume of tasks with minimal supervision at intermediate stages. Successfully able to cope melancholic and creative work – writing books, articles, activities of an artist, designer, etc.
The best choice for the melancholic is likely to be freelancing on a remote basis. This may be the work of a copywriter, creating websites, design, etc.